Sorry for the delay in posting. I know it has been awhile since I last wrote, but between my new AmeriCorps service year, full-time school and of course the hubby and kiddos, I have been one exhausted Mama. However, I do have some exciting news that I had to share with you all….
Baby Howard #3 is on the way! Yep, you read that right, we are expecting our third child, I’m due in October. The kiddos are super excited, and they can’t wait. I for one, can’t wait for the “morning sickness”, or rather what I affectionately refer to, the “all hours of the day sickness” to be over. 😉
Even though I haven’t been blogging, that doesn’t mean that God hasn’t been talking and I haven’t been learning. Believe me, if anyone learns the hard way it’s me, I can be stubborn. So I have a couple of confessions, or lessons on what I have learned about myself recently:
- I’m too busy. I know, I know, you are all shocked. However it’s true. Lately, I have been so busy, that I don’t even realize that I’m running full speed ahead until I completely crash with burn out. Or lately, exhaustion.
- I take on too many “projects” at one time. It’s not that I have a problem saying “no” to projects, it’s just I enjoy doing too many things, I’m a creative person. (See, I still can’t come to terms with this, lol!)
- I’m good at reaching my main goal, however, once I’ve accomplished this goal I stop. There’s no continuation of this goal to keep moving me forward. So then I develop a midlife crises every time I finish a goal, I question myself saying “Oh my gosh! Am I doing what I’m supposed to do with my life?”
The first one is pretty easy. I can wrap my head around that one and try really, really, hard to not let myself become so busy that I miss out on things and really focus on what’s important. I have to ask myself a question that I learned during a training program that I went through recently called Breaking Barriers. Does this action (being too busy) serve my needs over time? No. It really doesn’t. It just leaves me stressed and tired.
The second one, I’m still struggling through. This is part of the reason that I’m too busy, stressed and tired. However, I love crocheting, making cakes and teaching classes. But when you pile all of those full-time demands onto my already full-time schedule, (wife, mom, student, etc.) it’s too much. I can’t run at full speed with all of those at the same time.
The third one is more of an eye opener to me, and one that I’m excited about pursuing. I love lists and I love goals. So when I accomplish something and the excitement wears off, I’m left questioning. I realized that instead of continuing along with that same goal, I stop, because guess what, mission accomplished. But if I’m constantly achieving and stopping, then I’m always back where I started.
I may be good at decorating cakes, teaching and crafts, but that’s not who I am. I’m a writer. God has called me to write. I’ve known it since I was in middle school. That’s who I am, that’s what I’m supposed to do. The other things that I do are great, and have lots of blessings attached, but I can’t forget what I was put here to do.
I bring all of this up to say, that if God has called you to do something, do it. Don’t hesitate. If you know 100% that it is what He is calling you do, then do it. Don’t get too busy doing everything else that you stop focusing on it. Don’t get caught up in everything else that you love or have a talent for and completely ignore your calling, questioning if it’s right or not.
My favorite verse is Jer. 29:11. It says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” You were put here for a purpose. You have a mission to accomplish, something that only you can do, no one else can do it better than you. If you’re not sure what that is, then Pray. Ask. Listen.
Are you doing what God has called you to do? Or have you been like me and been too busy? I really love the chorus of “Who You Are” by Unspoken. It says: “You can never fall too hard, so fast, so far that you can’t get back when you lost where you are. It’s never too late so bad, so much that you can’t change who you are.”
It’s never too late to get started.