Psalm Chapter 4 ~
“Answer me when I call, O God who declares me innocent. Take away my distress. Have mercy on me and hear my prayer. How long will you people ruin my reputation? How long will you make these groundless accusations? How long will you pursue lies? You can be sure of this: The LORD has set apart the godly for himself. The LORD will answer when I call to him. Don’t sin by letting anger gain control over you. Think about it overnight and remain silent. Offer proper sacrifices, and trust in the LORD. Many people say, “Who will show us better times?” Let the smile of your face shine on us, LORD. You have given me greater joy than those who have abundant harvests of grain and wine. I will lie down in peace and sleep, for you alone, O LORD, will keep me safe.”
Jacob and I have a rule. It’s probably one of the best rules that we have in our relationship. We promised that we would never go to sleep angry or leave the house mad. I like the rule for the most part. I think it’s good. The only problem with it is how we have to handle our anger. I eventually like to talk and work everything out, but it’s usually after I blow up and then sit by myself and cry it out. Then I have to find Jacob and try to talk it out. Jacob on the other hand will brush off the anger or fight and then not want to talk about it. He’s perfectly fine after a while. Not me. I have to talk and try to find a way to fix it. I need Jacob to fix it.
Then there are those rare times when I don’t want Jacob to fix it. Have you ever heard of the country song “I just wanna be mad for while?” Perfect analogy for this. The beginning of the song starts about them going to bed angry and then in the morning she’s still mad even though she made him coffee. The chorus goes: “I’ll never leave, I’ll never stray, my love for you will never change. But I’m not ready to make up. We will get around to that. I think I’m right, I think you’re wrong, I’ll probably give in before long. Please don’t make me smile, I just wanna be mad for a while.” Have you ever felt like that? I know that I have. Jacob tries to make me laugh right in the middle of me being mad at him. He will say something funny, or sweet, he will do just about anything for me to stop and smile. Because what happens when you smile? You whole attitude changes. You feel better. There’s a quote that says something like, “It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown.” You just can’t keep frowning when someone is trying to get you to smile.
I’m not saying that’s it easy not to go to bed angry. There are plenty of times that I have, but in the morning, I always feel worse. I think there is a reason why verse 4 says: “In your anger do not sin; when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent.” Eph 4:26 says: “And don’t sin by letting anger gain control over you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry.”
What happens when you go to bed angry? You end up thinking about it all night, you dwell over it so much that it goes from your mind to your heart. In Luke 6:45 it says that “For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” If you are dwelling on your anger and you let it go to your heart, eventually what’s in your heart is going to come out. I’m not sure about you, but I much rather have love, joy and peace coming from my heart instead of anger. You can’t have love, joy or peace when you have anger in your heart. You will instead be mad, hurt and bitter. It’s ok to be upset, or angry about something, but it’s not ok for your anger to turn to sin. So next time your upset or angry at someone try to work it out before you go to bed. Try that with your spouse, I promise you that you won’t regret it in the morning. =D
Hugs,
Erin
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